Shedding Life
by Kiome-Yasha
Summary: I always thought I had all the answers already at the tip of my fingers; but it wasn't until losing someone I really cherished that the light I was hiding was already gone to recover back. DISCONTINUED!
1. Dusk

Declaimer: "I do not own Kingdom Hearts…."

Kiome-Yasha: "Okay, this story wouldn't leave me alone. I know I should be updating my other Namixas fics, but this one isn't actually long; it only has seven chapters in total. This story was inspired by _Handwritten's _story "Tainted Ocean"; also watching the movie "When Dreams May Come" helped a lot as well. I hope you'll enjoy this story and will leave a review! Oh, btw! This story is in Roxas's POV! This is my first time doing something like this. Again, inspired by _Handwritten_, read her stuff if you haven't read them yet; they're awesome! Also, warning; dark fic ahead!"

Chapter 1 Dusk

You know, you always think you have everything figured out when you turn seventeen, or eighteen; or maybe even when you finally get to that damn legal age to drink and smoke. I always thought I had all the answers already at the tip of my fingers; but it wasn't until losing someone I really cherished that the light I was hiding was already gone to recover.

RxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxN

The apartment was damp and cold, winter taking refuge throughout the whole house as its resting place. My fingers tingled against the cold glass of corona beer in my hand, the amber bubbles popping in merriment. My eyes were hazy like smoke, my body becoming numb from where I sat, waiting.

I was waiting for my wife Namine to come home. She had been making frequent visits to see my brother Sora lately over the month, causing my mind to become plagued with unwelcoming thoughts. My intoxicated head kept playing unwanted scenarios over and over again in my mind, making me drop my glass of beer. The burning liquid sunk into the burgundy carpet, the bottle carelessly colliding to the soft ground. I cussed under my breath, jolting forward from my seat.

I quickly tried to clean it up, growling over how I was just creating the stain to become worse. Out of pure fury, I reeled the glass bottle back and smashed it again the peeling wall.

I could hear the neighbors from next-door complaint about the sudden noise, sending me vulgar comments, which I completely ignored. I got up from my feet, hearing sirens from outside the bustling city, the sounds echoing inside my ears as they passed by. I could see white puffs of snowflakes descending and coating the building from outside through the living room windows.

I looked up at the ticking Mickey Mouse clock in the kitchen; Namine had bought it when we moved in. She had hoped for it to brighten up the gloomy and dim apartment. It was getting late, and she still hadn't returned any of my calls.

I looked over at my cell-phone that was on the kitchen table. I had called Namine numerous times already today, becoming anxious to have her call me back and tell me where she was. This sort of reaction caused me to become more disturbed over my fearing thoughts.

Just then, I heard the knob to the door begin to rattle; soon, Namine had walked in from the ruined hallway. She had snow covering her light blonde hair and baby blue coat, shaking them off as she entered the small apartment. She looked to be a broken snow angel, her eyes glazed with some sort of feeling of despondency.

I could feel anger begin to swell up in me, preparing to erupt like a boiling volcano. She's been gone for hours, and deep down, I could guess whom she was with. How could she do this to me? After all we've been through? I didn't want to believe it; I had tried to control it; I had tried to make her happy.

Before I could stop myself from releasing my inner turmoil of rage; I snapped at her, "Where were you!?"

She was shocked from the tone of my voice, causing her to freeze in fright where she stood, "What?" She asked unsurely, pressing a hand to her chest in concern.

"I asked where you were, Namine! I've been sitting here for hours! You should have been back from your interview for work a long time ago!! I even called you and left you messages!" God, don't lose it Roxas; look at her, she's shaking!

"Roxas, I…I…." She stuttered frighteningly, her body shivering from my heated wrath than the arctic draft that penetrated the house.

I marched up to her, slamming the door behind her and pinning her against the wall. I couldn't help but to feel angry, the lingering thought of her actually seeing my own brother behind my back clouding my judgment.

"Just tell me Namine…do I mean nothing to you anymore!!?"

"What are you saying!?" She finally got her nerves settled to respond clearly, becoming confused and flustered over my words.

"I'm talking about how you've been at Sora's place so much lately! What is it!? Are you sleeping with him!? I'm sorry I can't give you what you want, but did you really have to cheat on me to give me the hint!?" My eyes felt like they were on fire, bringing forth tears that threatened to fall. I could feel the strings that were connected to my throbbing heart snapping away.

"What!? It's nothing like that!!" She shouted, her lips beginning to tremble, "And it's just not him! I've been seeing…"

I cut her off, not believing what I was hearing, "You've been with somebody else as well!? God Namine!" I grabbed her wrists harshly, pinning them to the door. I could hear the neighbors' next door shouting at us to keep it down; but I gave them a quick '_Fuck you!'_ from my blinding rave.

"Roxas, you don't understand!!! I'm…I'm…" She tried to voice out her words, becoming hesitant to tell me what she was keeping secret. What was she hiding from me? Please Namine, don't let my assumptions be true.

"I'm sorry…" She finally says, placing her head down in shame, "…Roxas, please forgive me…"

I began to shake, but I couldn't tell if it was from hatred or from pure distraught, "So, it's true…"

She shook her head, denying my words. I grabbed her shoulders, trying to shake some answers out of her, "Namine! Tell me already!"

She brought her head up, causing me to freeze entirely from my brain to the bottom of my frost bitten toes. Two crystal tears fell down her flushed cheeks, her eyes drowning into their own abyss of light blue.

I didn't know how to react, finding the situation to be my fault when she was the one keeping secrets from me. I heard her soft voice break through the silence, shattering the spell I was under, "I can't…"

She broke through my hold, shoving me away from her before opening the door and running off down the hall. She had slammed the door back with great force, causing it to wheel itself back to the lock. I stood remotely where I was, taking a few steps back from the damaged door.

I whispered to myself, my eyes shaking as my tears cascaded down on the rug, "She'll come back…I know she will…she'll come back to me…this can't be true…"

I mindlessly closed the door, crashing myself to the ground as the smell of alcohol filled my lungs with stimulating condolence.

RxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxN

When I woke up, I noticed it was still nighttime outside, the snow finally coming to a halt from its rampaging chill. I slowly picked myself off the bumpy and cold floor, rubbing my eyes to shake off my exhaustion. I glanced around the diffuse apartment, finding no trace of anyone; meaning Namine didn't come back home.

I glanced over at the clock in the kitchen, finding it to be three in the morning; last time I checked, it was nine at night.

I lazily picked myself off the floor, stretching my aching muscles after sleeping on the stiff ground for so long. I heard a crack go off from my back, making me slump forward and sigh in satisfaction from the release.

Soon after, I found my phone going off on the kitchen table. It vibrated at first before the melodic ring-tone Namine had set up personally for me came on; it was _"I Walk Beside You"_ from Dream Theatre, a band we both loved.

I let the phone ring, not really caring much to pick it up. But when it went off three times in a row, that's when I got annoyed.

I roughly flipped the phone open, my voice hoarse and dry, "Hello?"

"Roxas, it's about damn time you pick up your phone!" It was Sora, the last person I wanted to hear from right now.

Just before I can tell him off, just before I could tell him how much of a bastard and scumbag he was, he shattered my world with these short words, "Roxas! Namine's in the hospital!"

End Chapter

Kiome-Yasha: "New record~!!! This has got to be my SHORTEST chapter ever! Don't worry though; the next chapter is definitely long! Remember this story is only seven chapters long! I think I have some mistakes in this chapter, so hopefully I could go back and fix them later. This chapter was basically to give off the mood and suspense to what the story is going to be about. I wanted this story to be a more realistic approach than my other stories; showing a true struggle between a young married-couple who are both damaged people. Is Namine really having an affair with Sora? How and when did Roxas and Namine first meet? When did they fall in love? While Namine is between life and death; Roxas is able to reflect over his relationship with the girl who he might lose, including something more."

Sora: "Come on, leave a review for us! You know you want to!!! Any thoughts would be nice!"


	2. Denial

Declaimer: "I do not own Kingdom hearts!"

Kiome-Yasha: "Thanks for the many supports and reviews everyone! I'm updating this as quickly as possible in order to get it out of the way. On with the fic!"

Chapter 2 Denial

I rushed through the automatic doors, turning my head left to right, hoping to spot anyone that may help me. The heating system in the place melted away the bit of snow that was on me, causing drips of water to fall where I stood and create a small puddle. I could smell alcohol pressing against opening wounds on tattered flesh not too far away, people rushing back and forth in white robes with someone that needed to be tended to. I felt sweat sizzle down my skin, making me not think straight in whom to turn to. I felt dizzy from the blinding ashen atmosphere, finding myself to be dead from the moment I finished my call with Sora.

Sora had called me to tell me that Namine got into a car accident, losing control of the wheel after driving on some slick ice. He told me he got the call from Twilight Hospital, explaining how her phone displayed his number as her last saved call. I couldn't help but to grip my phone tightly from the information, causing it to crack in several places. They told him her wounds were fatal, losing a lot blood from the collision.

I finally took notice of the front desk that was at the end of the entrance lobby, the reception being between two opening hallways.

I rushed over and braced myself on the white marble counter, "Hey! I'm looking for someone!"

One of the nurses placed the phone between her neck and shoulder, "Name?" She asked calmly, multi-tasking herself around her station.

"Namine! Namine Summers!" I shouted, needing answers over her condition as soon as possible.

"Are you a relative?" She asked evenly.

"I'm her husband! Roxas Summers!!!"

She looked at me strangely, probably thinking how young I looked to be married; not that it was any of her damn business. She soon put the phone down, "Sir, I'm going to need you to keep your voice down. You're in a hospital." She sternly remarked at me, causing a vein to throb on my forehead.

"No! I need to know which room she's in right now! I don't give a damn what you're saying! Tell me where she is!" I latched out at her, never being one to control my temper. How could I? Not with the night I was having.

"Roxas!"

I turned to the sound of my name, finding the voice to be from my older sister, Xion.

"Xion!?" I rushed over to her, completely forgetting the nurse I was talking to, "Where's Namine!? Is she okay!?"

It was funny how I still found myself worried and obsessively in love with the girl who might be cheating on me. But, I had my reasons to feel the way I did.

Xion placed her icy hands on my shoulders, trying to find her voice to speak, "She's in the emergency room. Roxas…" Her voice became weak, "…There was so much blood..." I didn't need to hear anymore.

I dodged the side of her, trying to figure out Namine's whereabouts in this Godforsaken morgue. I sprinted pass doctors and patients, looking through room after room for the woman I pledged to be with until I died.

"Roxas!" I turned around, Xion grabbing my sleeve and stopping me from my struggling pursuit.

"Didn't you hear me!? She's in the emergency room! You need to calm down and wait with me and the others until we get any further news." She heaved and explained, closing her eyes in exhaustion.

My distressed mind deflated itself, my heart scrunching up my insides, making my blood feel like it was on fire. The feeling rushed through my veins, making me cringe and embrace my stomach. I think I heard Xion ask me if I was all right, but my ears blocked out her voice as my body jolted forward.

Before I could stop myself, I felt that acidy sensation rise and erupt out of my parched mouth. I vomited all over the sterilized floor, collapsing to the ground at the thought of Namine fading out of my life…forever.

RxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxN

After getting myself cleaned up, washing away the repugnant taste out of my mouth from the smoldering fluids, I went and sat myself down with Xion and the others in the waiting area.

I slouched in my seat, massaging my temples to get rid of the nausea that was damaging my senses. I couldn't see Sora anywhere, Xion explaining how he wanted to get some snacks for everyone; I personally thought he couldn't face me.

I punched the bar that was connected to the chair I sat, the cold and hard steel making my hand swell from the soreness.

Aqua and Terra sat across from me, their baby girl Sol also accompanying them. She was fast asleep, seeing as it was four something in the morning. Aqua held onto her, the little pink bundle with light auburn hair making soft cueing noises from the motion of her body being rocked. Terra kept trying to get some answers on Namine's condition each time a doctor or surgeon came out of the emergency room.

It was always the same cliché lines…

'_We are doing the best we can…'_

'_Please wait a little longer…'_

'_We'll let you know soon…'_

It was making me sick, forming my hands into tight fists.

"Terra, calm down; I'm sure Namine will be fine." Ah Aqua, always the composed one when times of crisis, her husband Terra being more agitated.

Terra sat back down in his seat after receiving no progress or answers from the medical doctors. He carefully took attention to his one-year child, cradling her soggy red cheeks with his vigilant hands. It would seem like she was the cure in consoling his uneasiness, producing a soft yawn before smiling in her sleep.

Me? I couldn't help but to be more focused on my locked up rage and desperation for answers. It was clawing at me like a beast in frenzy, tearing up my insides in disarray.

I felt like I was going to vomit again, but I saved myself from doing so when Xion spoke up, "I called Hayner and the others about what happened. They should be here soon." She nestled her hands together, trying to keep herself calm and vigilant for any source of news.

I placed a fist to my face, scrunching up my features to a scowl; but deep down, I felt like I was about to go mad. Guilt seemed to rise through my body, colliding with my wild blood of anger in a battle for dominance over my body. I couldn't tell who was going to win, my head formulating a headache and pounding my nerves until they felt like they were about to burst.

I suddenly asked, rage winning the battle over my next words, "Where was she before the accident?"

Xion shook her head, obviously confused, "Didn't she return home?" I adjusted myself in my seat, "Yeah, but…"

"Roxas, what happened?" She firmly broke my thoughts, not liking the tone of my voice.

"Look." My voice was deadly and strict, "I think she's having an affair with Sora; ever since back then, she's been shunning me away."

Xion's eyes widened, her eyes avoiding mine. The change of her expression told me right away that my own sister was hiding something from me, "Xion, don't tell me you knew about this!"

The strident level to my voice woke Sol up from her slumber, causing her to whimper and to scrunch up her face in irritation. Aqua right away tried to sooth her back to sleep, both her and Terra looking over at Xion and I with questioning trepidation.

Xion whipped her face at me in resentment, tears blurring her eyes in frustration, "You don't know anything! Namine felt so ashamed Roxas, she never meant to hurt you…the weight she had been carrying…. Ever since…"

I pleaded frantically, "What is it!? What did Namine do!?"

Terra actually came up to me, trying to hold me back from my distress; but I shoved him off me, "Xion?"

"Roxas…Namine still loves you…but now…. she's carrying this burden like some sin…her and Sora…"

"What about her and Sora?" I asked with a low voice, narrowing my eyes at her.

She looked up at me, her eyes reflecting pity at me, "Roxas, I'm…so sorry."

My breath became shaky, my mind shattering to the betrayal that was in front of me. My lips trembled, Terra bracing my arms and keeping me from falling over in my seat.

I swallowed deeply, a short whine coming out of me. I felt so confused and aggravated, the notion of my fears abusing my thoughts to become scrambled. I placed my hands on my face, motioning my features around in a pure mess of seething hysteria.

I heaved in and out, finding no words to escape my mouth. I clenched my muscles, blocking out everything around me.

Just before I could make everything go away inside the gurgling void, I heard the doors to the emergency room swish open.

Everyone admittedly ignored the conversation that was going on, taking his or her new attention on the passive doctor.

Everyone stood up and walked over to him, everyone, except me. I looked at him through the opening cracks of my long fingers, my eyes remaining hidden in the shadows.

Terra was the first to speak among us, his trait in leadership taking over him, "Well, how is she? Is she out of the woods?"

The doctor wiped some blood off his gloved hands, making me cringe of how serious this was, "We stitched and cleaned up all of her wounds, but it seems like she is in a coma like state. She has lost a lot of blood from the accident. I don't know when she will wake up."

This caught all of us to be on guard, "…I'm afraid she's facing some internal issues towards her mental health, which is seriously affecting her body. I can't really say what it could be. The others and I are studying over this as we speak."

"STUDYING!!? SHE'S NOT SOME DAMN LAB SPECIMEN!" My emotions detonated, the doctor stepping on the hidden landmine.

Everyone turned and looked at me in shock, Aqua embracing Sol from my vociferous tone.

I continued to rant over the doctor's words of discouragement, "Namine isn't going anywhere!!! She'll come out of it!!! This isn't happening again!!! This isn't happening again DAMMIT!!!" Xion looked at me with a flustered look, struggling from being whitewashed from my raging cry. She cupped a hand to her mouth, resisting the urge to shatter from the sight of me. I could see her eyes become red from the unyielding tears she was trying to hold back.

"So…don't you DARE give me this bullshit that she might not wake up and fight this!! She will get through this!!! I know my Namine, she'll never…." I didn't know when my tears had started to fall, but they were coming down like a broken dam. I was severely broken, and there was no one around that had the right pieces to glue or paste me back together. There was only one person who could, and she was suffering in the other room inside some nightmare I couldn't pull her out of.

Dammit, how hypocritical could I be? I was just blaming and accusing her for cheating on me with Sora not too long ago. But I couldn't help it, not with what we lost; not with how much we already suffered. It's because of that day, that I…

No, even it was true…. Namine is…I just know…

My vision became white, clouding over me like a blanket, sending me back to a time during my childhood where darkness could not touch me.

RxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxN

_A small boy with blonde tousle of hair with deep blue eyes that rivaled with the deepest depths of the ocean, shouted with giggling merriment as his sister and brother pushed him on the swing. His features creased with delight, making his whole face prickle from the tingling bubbles. It was the middle of July, the scorching heat of summer bringing everything to life from its bathing rays of light. _

_After awhile, both his siblings announced how they were going to the store real quick to get some sea-salt ice cream._

"_We'll be right back, Roxas! Don't move anywhere!" The young sister softly demanded. She had short sheets of black hair, her cobalt blue striking affection for her little brother. Roxas's older brother had bristly and russet hair, his eyes an exact replica of his._

_Xion grabbed hold of Sora's pudgy hand, leading him out of the park that was by the beach. Roxas stood where he was, waiting patiently for their return with sweet and yummy sea-salt ice cream. His mouth watered from the thought of the sweet frozen bar, its taste quenching the core center of his tongue each time he had one._

_But its divine and unpredictable taste did nothing to prepare him for the blissful joy one little girl provided for him._

_Roxas turned to look around the almost abandoned playground, finding no one around the gym or at the monkey bars. He stopped to catch notice though of a small girl whose white blonde hair matched with those of the sun's beaming highlights. _

_He slowly and cautiously approached the oblivious girl; almost scared in being caught from the spell she had unmistakably placed him under._

_He took baby steps, the petite girl humming a melody he was not familiar with, the motor of her smooth voice hidden beneath her throat. The white summer gown she wore had smudges of charcoal, the colors smearing the white silk; but pleasantly ruining it. The girl was drawing a surreal setting of her milking imagination, etching in all sources of things: pink butterflies, blue unicorns, dozens of rainbows, white puffy clouds, a castle, and what looked to be a replica of her with a crown on her head; a typical little girl's dream._

_Roxas actually giggled inside from her fantasy, admiring her talent and imagery._

_The young seven-year-old boy assumed the girl to be close to his age, her small hands matching with the glittering colors that were on the black pavement. _

_Just before he could reach and touch the girl's shoulder, a broad and lofty boy came over with a bucket of water. Roxas recognized the person to be Seifer, a notorious bully who picked on others for amusement; but the girl had close relations with this troubled child._

"_Namine, dad says it's time to go home. You know what happens if you don't listen!" He warned her, edging the bucket that was in his hand to tilt forward, sending drops of water on her drawings that she had worked hours on._

_Roxas bit down on his lip from the threat, cringing from the feeble sound she made when she tried to cover her drawings from the slopping water. She whined, her eyes begging for Seifer to stop as she spoke with a supple and feathery voice, "Seifer, please…"_

_The boy gave no heed to her cries, spilling the bucket of freezing water from the ocean over her body and doodles. The once colorful concrete that was covered in pictures became nothing more than wet streaks of running liquid. Namine sniffed from the lost of her drawings, the sun's temperature smoldering the water on her pale skin, making her dress stick to her body._

"_Dad's going to be mad when he sees you all wet!" Seifer cackled evilly, but not until grunting in pain when he felt a durable force hit itself upon his cheek. _

_The bulky boy fell to the ground like nothing, a tight fist hanging in midair and belonging to none other than miniature Roxas himself. Adrenaline had rush through Roxas's small physique, gaining him the courage to bring his fist up and knock the taller boy down. In the finale of it all, it was to seek revenge in making the cherubic saint crying. _

_Seifer shook out of his daze, growling when he saw Roxas. He heaved himself off the callous ground, tackling the boy and bringing himself on top of him. Seifer struck him on the face, bashing punches left to right. Namine rushed over and climbed herself on top of her older brother's back, struggling to pull him off of her mysterious defender. He felt the pressure on his back, reeling his shoulder and knocking Namine back to the ground, causing her to skin her legs. _

_Roxas gasped from the abuse, grinding a punch to Seifer's gut. He then performed rapid punches to his face, giving him a swift kick to his side until he was knocked over and groaning in pain. Seifer picked himself up and ran off, the pain on his side throbbing too much for him to continue the brawl. _

"_I'm telling Dad, Namine! You'll be sorry for this!" He shouted over his shoulder, taking off out of the mini-park and towards home._

_Roxas scuffed at the whiny boy, his face covered with small blotches of blood and dirt. He turned to the timid girl, her legs bumping into each other as she bashfully squirmed where she was._

"_Are you alright?" He was referring to her scarred knees._

_She looked down at the scratches, nodding her head at him, "I'm fine…I get more booboos from Daddy." _

_Roxas didn't know what to make of that, only staring down at her ruined art, "I'm sorry about your drawings. It was coming out pretty too."_

_She reduced a sad smile, but was surprised when she saw Roxas pick up her crayons and began drawing over a new black space. _

"_What are…?"_

"_Let's finish the drawing, but this time…together." He happily announced, sniffing and wiping some blood that was dripping down his nose._

_Namine gasped from the sight, hurrying over to him and picking up the edge of her white dress to clean his blood off. Roxas blushed, finding she had no clarity whatsoever in showing her pink panties from her rising dress._

_She smiled, patting her stained dress down, "There, all better." She then kissed his nose, causing his face to erupt, "Mommy always kissed my booboos when I got hurt…but she's gone now."_

_Roxas became quiet from her words, taking a sign that her mother must have died recently. _

"_Daddy watches me and my brother now; but he gets REALLY mad when he drinks this yucky juice. He says Mommy took some bad medicine and that's why she had to leave." Roxas felt uncomfortable of how innocent and naïve she was._

_She rubbed her arms, "Daddy hits me and my big brother a lot, so I'm fine with these little scars." She poked her knees, grinning back at Roxas who had a sullen look on his face._

"_Is there something wrong?" She asked carefully, her eyebrows faltering with concern._

"_No, not at all. Why don't we finish the drawing?" He chirped, taking some color chalks and passing it over to her._

_Namine nodded, landing herself on the floor and beginning to draw with the unusual headed boy. They restored everything back to the way it was, the only new thing that was added being a prickly-headed blonde, whose hair swooshed to one side with deep indigo eyes. Namine claimed him to be the prince, saving the princess from the terrible dragon; which Roxas happily drew with consent. _

_The two flaxen haired children smiled with pride over their creation, Roxas running over to get his bag by the swings to take a picture of it. He always carried his camera around, the device being child-safety._

_The flash went off, a small click penetrating out of the tool, "There, now we have the picture to remember it." Namine nodded in agreement, both her and Roxas becoming startled when someone called out his name._

"_Roxas!" He turned to spot his sister Xion with Sora, the both of them already taking their share of sea-salt ice cream._

_He smiled and waved at them, "Coming!" He looked over at the angelic girl, "I have to go now." He scratched his nose diffidently, "My name is Roxas by the way. I'll be seeing you again, right…Namine?" He recalled the name escaping Seifer's mouth from before._

_She briskly nodded, an ingenuous smile playing across her pursed pink lips, "I'll be here tomorrow; I promise!" He chuckled from her childlike reply, running over to his siblings._

_Namine giggled when she saw Xion scold and ask Roxas about his injuries. He promptly began explaining to her, giving Namine a vigorous wave as he left with his brother and sister._

_Namine innocuously bended her fingers to signal her goodbye to him, picking up her supplies and heading back home. She knew what the outcome would be when she got back; but she held no fear over it, for she had made a new friend._

_Just as Namine promised, she returned the next day, the clashes of the waves creating a soothing and tranquil resonance against the Twilight shores from her arrival. But, as excited and thrilled as Roxas was to see her, he became frighten over the black spots that covered her body. He asked about them, Namine simply saying how she came home late and how Daddy wasn't so happy about it._

_He wondered if he should tell a grown up about it, but Namine frightfully hesitated the idea. So, they both decided to ignore the bruises; Roxas finding her presence to glow, despite the darkness that surrounded her. He wanted to protect this girl though, to be by her side and to make her happy._

_He became Namine's best friend throughout the years, the both of them expanding their relationship into something more. _

_But over the years that passed, the shadows of their lives did nothing to prepare the upcoming grief of their loss._

End Chapter

Kiome-Yasha: "Yay, I got to update this! I think I have some mistakes on here, so I'm hoping to go over it later. Yeah, a lot more hints to what's probably going on between Roxas and Namine. A lot of their inner suffering comes from their past, which will be revealed more in the next chapter. I love how you guys are coming up with theories over what Namine might be hiding from Roxas; the pregnancy thing being too cliché, so it's not that. You'll be able to see the harshness to this story very soon; revealing the dark past both Namine and Roxas carry as their burden. And yes, Namine was abused as a child, but since not much was revealed over her past because of her young age, I will tell you guys more about it. Namine's father is a drunk, abusing both his kids. When he said how Namine's mother took some bad medicine and left, it's because her mother committed suicide; becoming distressed over the life she had with such an abusing husband. Is that dark enough for you? Well, stay tune for more dark issues that is to be faced in this story, for the sadness isn't over! Thank you guys so much for the reviews from last time; I hope to be getting more from you guys!"

Sora: "Kiome-Yasha would like to give special thanks to: _AonAllstars_ (for being the first reviewer!), _Silentmusic16_ (for reviewing each time!), _Antiyaoifan_ (for nicely reviewing!), _DamnBlackHeart_ (for being a true best friend!), _KeytoDestiny_ (for giving a long supportive review!), _HeartlessBuggy_ (for being a faithful reviewer!), _Hanabi-Neko _(for kindly reviewing!), _Handwritten_ (for being a inspirational writer and taking time to review!), and _Kingdom~sky_ (for being the last reviewer for the first chapter!) Thanks again for reviewing everyone, we love you all so much! Leave a review to show us your love!"


	3. Anger

Declaimer: "I do not own Kingdom Hearts."

Kiome-Yasha: "Okay, I really need to get this story done. For I need to work on _Whispers in the Dark_ as soon as possible; and then after that, I shall work on _The Way You Remember Me._ Remember everyone, reviews make Kiome-Yasha really happy to write; it pushes me to keep going! Oh, and thank you all who reviewed; I shall say my thanks at the end of this chapter!"

Chapter 3 Anger

It took Xion awhile to calm me down, the doctors needing to transfer Namine into another room so they can stabilize her. I couldn't bear to see her, not yet.

I waited with Xion in the waiting room, Terra, Aqua and their baby Sol being the first to go and see Namine. Terra was related to Namine by blood, so it was only natural for him to go see his cousin first.

My nerves were shaking, the stench inside the infirmary reviving memories that continue to haunt me in my dreams. Xion wrapped her hand in mine; playing the role as the big sister who was trying to help me during my time of need.

"Are you alright? That must of brought a lot of skeletons out of the closet." She muttered to me, combing her slender fingers through my unruly hair.

I only nodded, "Yeah…It's just…I just want to get out of this…despite everything."

She only gave me a look of sympathy, bringing her hand out my hair and back into her lap. She soon closed her eyes in frustration, almost contemplating herself in saying something.

She softly spoke to me, "Roxas, there's something you have to understand…I just couldn't tell you because of a promise I made…to Namine…"

I swiftly turned to her, becoming inquisitive to what she was trying to say to me, "What is it?" I austerely asked, bringing my elbows on my lap.

She unsteadily looked at me, her mouth opening to speak; but they gasped in shock instead. Something caught her attention, making me turn around and spot what it could be; it was Sora.

He had couple of bags in his hands, Hayner and the others walking behind him, "Hey, look who I found while entering back inside the lobby." He light-heartedly spoke, trying to bring some cheer to the gloomy atmosphere.

I growled under my breath, "You son of a bitch!" I wasn't afraid to insult my mother, considering the selfish crimes she had committed inside our family in the past.

Xion couldn't make sense to what happened next, everyone shouting in surprise over the punch I sent to Sora's face. He fell to the ground, the snacks that were in the bag scattering across the shiny marble floor.

"Roxas! What the he--!" I sliced him off, breaking his face with another punch. I straddled over his form, lifting his collar and bringing his face towards mine, "You BASTARD!" I sputtered at him, his face beginning to swell, "Because of you! You ruined everything! Why Sora? Why did you have to go and screw with Namine of all people!?! My wife!" I liberated scornfully, slamming him back onto the ivory tiles; I swore I could see blood beginning to drip at the back of his head.

Axel and Hayner tried to get me off of him, the both of them panicking from the sight of the thick gory color. My punches became vicious, blood scattering my knuckles from the mess I was making on Sora's face. I was like a caged beast that was finally released after being mocked at for so long.

I heard Olette shouting at me to stop, becoming distressed over the scene that was occurring in front of her. Pence had tried to convince me to stop as well, helping Hayner and Axel by prying me off of Sora.

I was finally lifted off my feet, a stinging slap making its way across my cheek; the hit was so hard, my face was whipped harshly to the side.

I looked back in shock to see whom the assaulter was, becoming flabbergasted when I discovered the smack to be from Xion. She had tears streaking down her pale cheeks, her arm that commended the blow shaking with uncontrollable hysteria.

Everyone became silent, Pence helping Sora off the floor, calling a nurse that was nearby to help. He looked to be slightly unconscious, but he was still mindful over what was going on around him. The nurse came over to inspect Sora's condition, but he softly pulled her away, murmuring how he was fine. He looked over at Xion and I, trying to seek some answers into why I attacked him so suddenly.

Xion snarled at me with a low intense rumble, "How selfish can you really be…?" She asked me quietly, her eyes sparking daggers at me, causing me to freeze in my place.

She unexpectedly harassed me, taking a fist full of my coat and pinning me against the wall ruthlessly, "How **SELFISH **can you be **ROXAS**!!?" She shouted at me, her tears coming down much faster and harder than before.

"Xion…" Sora groaned out her name, hoping to calm her down with his persuading tone. He guessed by her reaction of what was going on and what I was accusing him of. He winced as blood began to drip down on his forehead, Olette and Pence helping him to stand on his feet.

"What…?" I mindlessly spoke; she added more force onto my back against the wall, "You want to know why Namine has been acting so distant from **you**!? **Do you**!? Maybe **that** will calm your testosterones down from telling you what's **truly** going on with your **wife**!?"

I gasped from the force of her words, cringing from her unforgiving tone.

"Xion!" Sora forcefully warned her from continuing on any further with her words.

"No, Sora! He needs to know the **damn **truth! I can't keep my promise anymore while he's acting like this!" She answered back at him, her knuckles going white by the grip she had on me.

Everyone seemed to become discouraged, avoiding me with his or her eyes. Wait, were they all in on this damn promise that Namine couldn't codify to me?

"Roxas, Namine has been…" Xion lightly began to let go of her grasp on my coat; "…She has been seeking 'special help' for the pass three years."

My eyes widened from her term of words, "Special help? Why? What's wrong!?" I became startled from such news, not knowing how to take it.

"Roxas…" I turned to the sound of Axel's voice, but he soon became quiet when he found my eyes on him.

"It all started four years ago…" Sora spoke, taking my full attention on him, "…I caught Namine trying to make attempts at suicide."

My eyes stretched painfully wide from this realization, my eye socket shaking with fear and despair. It wasn't long until my body became influence by my trembling soul, the pain being too much for me to make sense of my surroundings to even being real. No, this had to be some illusion! There was no way that could be true! Namine was happy with me! She was happy! That's when memories of that 'day' came back to me, causing me shatter from my sightlessness as the light finally beamed through my vision.

I collapsed to the ground when Xion fully let me go, her soft whimpering overpowering the area, until she too fell to the ground in anguish. Everyone became deathly silent, becoming lost over what words to say to comfort the hushed air.

Axel looked down at me with pity, slowly bringing a hand over to my quivering back. When I felt the contact I dashed forward, bringing myself up on my feet and taking off down the hall with full speed. I heard the others call out after me, but I drowned them out, letting the rushing wind being the only sound to enter my ears.

I just wanted to escape the reality of this world, just for that moment, just to let me go free from its cruel reality.

RxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxN

_Roxas chuckled gaily in the car with his drunken gang of friends, taking a swig of the burning beverage in his hand with glee. It helped him to forget about his troubles, seeing as his life had been nothing more but a lost hope filled with lies and deception. _

_It wasn't long ago that he had discovered his mother having an affair with one of her co-workers at her job. She even had a kid with that person, one he and the rest of the family did not know of; that kid being him. They always did wonder where the blonde hair had come from, and now they had their answer. _

_He had been living a lie for years, his father having had registered a divorce with his whore of a wife. His mother collapsed from the decision, taking up drugs and alcohol as his supposed father took custody of Sora and Xion; declaring how he didn't want anything to deal with a child that wasn't his. Xion had convinced Roxas though of how they would always be siblings, no matter what the circumstances were of the horrible truth._

_Ever since the reality that was given to him, Roxas became a lost cause. His mother didn't want to have anything to do with him, losing her dignity down empty glasses of beer, the company of tobacco smoke being her paradise. From the neglection he received, Roxas became a troubled teen, getting himself into fights to relieve his uncontrollable rage. He took up his mother's bad habits, becoming recruited into a gang called Organization XIII. _

_Despite Xion's encouraging words that they were still family, Roxas felt broken and torn up inside. _

_His eyes became glazed with aching desire, taking a drag of the cigarette that was between his crushing teeth. Axel drove wildly down the street, chunking down a bottle of beer before throwing the empty glass out into the pavement through his open window. The glass shattered loudly, causing car alarms to go off and dogs to bark warningly. _

_Roxas's best friend then swiftly turned to his girlfriend Larxene, who sat in the passenger seat, giving her a passionate kiss that led to other places. She giggled with delight inside the car, letting out a cheer before taking a mouthful of her rum._

_Roxas shifted back and forth in his seat, some of the other members in the gang Zexion and Demyx sitting in the back with him. The two of them passed different sources of drugs to get themselves high. The fifteen-year-old felt faint over the intoxicating odor, the stench overwhelming his young senses. He clutched his stomach, throwing up at the back of the seat._

_Axel only chuckled blithely over the sight, "Can't hold your stomach there, little buddy?" He banged the wheel with utter laughter and amusement, finding himself to be too elevated to care over the mess, or foul stench in his car._

_Roxas chortled unsurely, wiping his mouth from the bitter taste. He soon found Zexion passing him some wrapped up nicotine, taking it hesitantly before taking a swill from the bud. He became delirious from the taste, his senses burning from the sensation. He settled himself back into his seat, looking outside through the passing images, finding everything begin to slow down._

_The colors began to blur themselves together, making him feel safe over the surreal setting that was clouding his mind. It helped bring him back to a simpler time, a time when he had met his current girlfriend; Namine._

_All of a sudden, Axel steered himself on the sidewalk in front of Roxas's house, the boy stumbling himself out of the car. Everyone inside the car laughed at the boy's deformity as he struggled to walk up the road towards his house. _

_Axel leaned over Larxene's lap, "Hope we didn't make your mother wait on you too long, Roxas buddy." The boy sloppy turned himself around, his face contorted with mockery, "Are you fucking kidding me!? The bitch was probably too fucked up to even notice I was gone!" _

_He waved his arms up, letting the others howler out in hilarity over his blunt words. Axel then honked his horn, driving off the sidewalk and setting back out into the road; the car passing out thick amount of gas as they trailed off._

_Roxas stumbled over to the porch, the wood creaking over the weight of his body. As he tried to fish out his keys inside his long leather coat, he gasped in fear when he heard a creak come next to him from the swing._

_He immediately shifted his sight to the swing set, finding a form all too familiar. He relaxed his racing heart, discovering the person to be Namine, "Shit…Namine…" He said ruefully, forgetting all about his keys to enter the house, "What are you doing here?" He brought himself over to her, deciding to sit right next to her; any crude demeanor he had with Axel and the others slipping away when in her charming and wholesome presence. _

_She was quiet, letting her feet drag the swing back and forth where they sat, Roxas doing the same. She fumbled with her blue skirt, Roxas taking attention on her creamy white legs; memories of their soft touch revitalizing his passion for the girl next to him. _

"_You looked to be having fun…" She muttered lowly to him, her bangs shadowing over her bright cerulean eyes. They could hear the soft melodies of crickets chirping, making the street seem abandoned._

_Roxas looked at the direction where the gang was a few moments ago, giving out a tentative chuckle, "Not really, if you ask me." He hovered his hand over to her arm, speaking huskily over to her, "I rather just have fun with you though." The hint in his voice made Namine squirm away from his touch. Safe to say, Roxas felt neglected from her treatment towards his seduction. _

"_How do you think this is affecting everyone, Roxas? To me?" Namine timidly asked, but she proved to put up a brave front of how serious she was being._

_Roxas huffed and slouched back into his seat roughly, causing the swing to bang against the house, "Dammit, Namine! Don't start this shit up again!" _

_The girl swiftly turned to him, beginning to plead, "Roxas please! It's hurting me to see you be like this! I don't like this person you are becoming!" She had tears beginning to brim at the side of her crystal colored eyes._

_He scornfully lifted himself off the rocker, starting to fume over her words; this isn't what he wanted to come home to. _

"_Roxas, if you only knew how dangerous this road you are taking is becoming!" She lifted her body off the chair, encircling his back with her arms as a last resort, "Sooner or later they're going to catch you and throw you in jail! Or worse!" She trembled from the thought, not knowing what she would do if her fears ever did come true._

_Roxas shuttered from her touch, bracing his face into his hands to block out the conversation he was finding himself in. He knew she was right, but part of him; a deep and dark part of him, refused to yield to her cries._

_Dear sweet and broken Namine…._

_It wasn't until recently that she bore witness to her own brother's death; killed by the hands of their own psychopathic drunk of a father. Luckily, the bastard was now in jail, rotting away in whatever cell he was assigned to; away from his precious daughter; staying there for the remainder of his existence. Namine now lived with her cousin Terra, him and his family taking the girl in since the tragedy; it was a miracle how she wasn't mentally scarred or traumatized from such a thing. Supposedly, it was because of Roxas that she had not broken down yet, her spirit remaining unscathed when being with him. But with the new damage result of his life, she was beginning to tilt towards that edge and fall._

"_Roxas, if only you knew how this was affecting your family." She whispered mellifluously to him, causing him to break all train of thought._

_He carefully, but roughly shoved her off his back, his eyes glaring at her frightened ones, "I have no family! Or did you forget!?" He chastised at her, causing her to look at him with compassion and ignominy._

_She replied calmly, "No, I didn't forget…" She sounded hurt by his words._

_Roxas noticed this, letting out a heavy sigh of release before drawing Namine into a hug, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to lose my temper like that." She shook her head underneath his chin, hugging him back before letting herself go from his arms._

"_There's something I have to tell you Roxas…" She spoke fearfully, needing to choose her next words carefully, "You may not like it…"_

"_What is it, Nami?" He asked amiably, using her nickname that he had given her long ago; placing pieces of her curls behind her ears before cradling her round cheeks in his rough hands._

_The young fourteen-year-old began to rub her pelvic area, looking up at Roxas nervously, "When I said about family, I meant; __**our **__family." She emphasized the word 'our', continuing to stroke the underside of her belly._

_Roxas looked towards the motion she was giving towards her abdomen, his mind coming to realization to what she was referring of. No, it couldn't be true, not now; not with the fucked up life he was having right now._

_When she saw the look of shock in the eyes, cleansing his fears to be true, "Roxas…I'm pregnant…" He huffed out some air, finding everything to be too artificial for him to grasp._

_He stumbled backwards, grabbing the ledge of the porch. He brought a hand over to his curly spikes, rubbing it furiously. He was quiet for a while, making Namine feel apprehensive towards his reaction; not that she expected anything else._

"_I'm sorry, I guess some things are better left unsaid…" She bowed her head down at him so he wouldn't see her rising tears. She sucked it up, taking off to the side in order to make her escape; but she was stopped by a powerful, but gentle grip upon her arm._

_Namine squinted, expecting some sort of scorn from him of it being her fault; but she got the opposite. _

_Roxas swiftly turned herself around, gripping her tightly into a breathtaking embrace. She gasped from the position, giving her tears the liberty to fall. When she realized what was happening, Namine fought to break free from Roxas's crushing embrace. She began to whimper and whine, finding that he wasn't allowing her to let go._

_She moaned from his inexorable grip around her small body, "Roxas, don't…!"_

"_I love you…!" He confidently confessed, his body beginning to tremble. His words of declaration surprised Namine, causing her to remain still in his hold._

_She soon began to cry from his words, returning his embrace, "I…I love you too!" She stuttered but firmly announced, gripping her hold on him tighter._

_After holding each other for awhile under the illuminating moonlight, Namine spoke into Roxas's chest; she somehow found comfort in his alluring smell of tobacco and alcohol to speak, "What…what are…what are we going to do?" He knew she needed to ask, considering how young they were to even be having a child; much less the fact that they slept together._

"_I honestly don't know…" He confirmed sincerely, "But I do know this…" He broke their embrace, his eyes bathing in her beauty, "…I do know that I love you, and that I want to be with you…that, despite the conditions of our lives; I want to have this baby with you." He cautiously placed a hand over her stomach, almost afraid that he would hurt her and the baby by touching the area, "I don't want you to suffer anymore, Namine. If you want to have this baby, then I…"_

"_I do!" She announced, catching him off guard, "I want to take full responsibility for this child; but I want to do it…with you…" She softly recommended, placing her hand over his._

"_I don't want to suffer anymore, Roxas. I want this baby to be a new hope for us." She grinned up at him, "Even if people look down upon us, I want to keep this baby. I really do believe that this baby is the key in giving us our happiness."_

_He nodded at her, her words making him agree with the same belief, "Alright then." He then chuckled, "I guess we're having a baby…we're having a baby…" He then smiled up at the dark glittering sky from the realization, lifting Namine up into the air and spinning her around, "We're having a baby!!!" He proudly shouted, causing Namine to giggle out in glee._

_They soon heard the neighbors shout from next door, telling them to shut their yapping. But Roxas decisively told them to stick it where the sun don't shine; finding the moment he was in with the love of his life to be a treasured memory than a disgraceful one._

_But such a thing that was supposed to provide them the light they were searching for; only grew to be a part of their never-ending darkness._

End Chapter

Kiome-Yasha: "Yay, another chapter complete! There you guys have it; Namine was hiding her attempts in committing suicide from Roxas. I'm sure you guys can guess from the flashback and to the present of how everything is connected. If not, well, I can't really say much if you didn't. Anyway, my favorite part to this chapter would have to be the flashback. I think it seemed realistic and mature, both Roxas and Namine possessing much pain over their lives, but hope at the same time. I hope you guys liked the scene between them. This story means a lot to me, considering it's kind of based on real experiences from my life. Leave a review please if you can! It makes me happy to know that you guys like the story!"

Sora: "Kiome-Yasha would like to give special thanks to: _AonAllstars _(For once again, being the first reviewer!), _Idiotique _(For being an awesome writer and leaving support in reviewing!), _Hanabi-Neko_ (For being a energetic reviewer!), _Silentmusic16 _(for lending support and reviewing!), _Damnblackheart _(for once again, being a true awesome best friend!), _DarkSora185_ (For giving a word out in a review!), _Antiyaoifan _(For being a cheerful reviewer!), _HeartlessBuggy_ (For remaining a faithful reviewer!), _Kingdom~Sky _(For lending thy thoughts and reviewing!), _Narutochaos22_ (For being a friend on youtube and reviewing!) _Chococrepes _(For being a great Namixas writer and a true friend, thanks for the review!) I hope you guys will keep supporting and reviewing! We love you all!"


	4. Bargaining

Declaimer: "I do not own Kingdom Hearts."

Kiome-Yasha: "Going back to college sucks; enough said."

Chapter 4 Bargaining 

I didn't know how far I traveled or even cared to discover where I had stumbled. All I could really feel was the freezing temperature of ice winter penetrating through my sore feet and making them numb from the pain that was surging through me. When I finally looked up, snow came over my vision, layering over my body and doing little to ease my suffering.

I panted heavily, puff of air escaping through my mouth, tears falling down on my flushed cheeks as they turned icicle. They tingled down my anesthetize cheeks, the feeling causing me to tremble from its moist slide.

I looked around me, finding myself to be outside and away from the place I considered hell. I bathed in the sensation of the frosting atmosphere, taking a gulp of saliva and shuttering out a sigh. I closed my eyes momentarily before opening them up again, magically, and ironically; I found myself to be led back to the place where I had first met my other half. The girl that smiled no matter how bad her life got; until that glass that surrounded her heart was finally shattered.

How stupid was I? I just let those pieces remain broken, letting Namine handle everything on her own until she bled herself to death. She had tried to repair herself, only to become miserable over her inner turmoil; God knows the attempts she did to end her life. I shuttered with abhorrence over the thought, my heart clenching tightly and suffocating me.

I gripped my hands to my face, trying to resist the overflowing tears from the harsh truth. I then let myself breath-in the cold air, taking slow steps forward over the snow infested and abandoned playground.

I reached over the swing sets, the rusty bars creaking from the passing gust of wind; the swing set being Namine's favorite. I dusted off the snow that was piled over one swing, sitting myself down and letting my mind drift away.

I lightly swayed myself back and forth, looking up at the grey colored sky, spotting the sun over the horizon. The heated wave of the sun did little to stop the cascading white powder from above. The wet snow fell over my body, making my hair feel drenched along with my coat; I didn't care, I wanted anything to numb the pain I was feeling.

The ashen color of wisp took my mind back to Namine. She had been depressed over the course of the years, and me; being the bad husband that I was didn't do anything to heal with her. I mourned alone from our loss, letting my grief consume me to depression. I let myself become lost over bottles of liquor, hoping for the liquid acid to burn away the memories that I couldn't gain.

By doing this, I never noticed…I never noticed…Namine…

"Dammit…" I grinded my teeth, mashing them together so hard that it throbbed, "Namine…please forgive me…" I couldn't stop the tears from falling, feeling like I was the worse prick that ever existed, "I'm so sorry…I never meant…"

Before I knew it, I looked up at the sky, my eyes rimmed with traces of red as my tears left me to go dry, "I don't believe in you, but…" I couldn't believe what I was about to do, but I had no other person to turn to besides the one that was inching towards death, "I don't even think you exist, considering how fucked up you made the world to be…but…please…I pray to you after so many years of being stupid…please, let Namine live through this." I clenched my hands together, placing my forehead on top of them, "I know I've been selfish, but please; let me be selfish one more time and give her back to me… so I can fix my mistakes…"

I shook my head, "Dammit, this is useless..." I forced my head down, crunching my face to a frustrated expression, "I want to make things right…just give me another chance…" I tried to bargain and explain, my body completely leaving me to feel nothing else but my pulsing and pumping heart. The blood that traveled through my veins did little to recover my lost warmth.

The sun lifted itself to the sky, its light and warmth causing the snow to glisten all around me. I sighed, rubbing my hands into my wet hair, taking my gaze up to the lit up sky. The neon colors or pink, orange and purple reflected off of my eyes as they brought me back to the time when Namine officially became part of my life.

RxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxN

_Roxas knew with Namine being pregnant, it was only natural for him to propose her hand in marriage. Although it took him much time to ask the girl to be his wife, considering the lost of time he received when seeking for Terra's approval. Safe to say, Namine's cousin wasn't so happy over the predicament the two young teens had put themselves in. But Roxas swore to him, he would get a job to support them and the baby; dropping right out of school and ditching the Organization XIII for the girl who was carrying his child. He wanted to show Terra that he was the one meant to be by Namine's side; that he was responsible and worthy enough to be her husband._

_As for Namine, she was busy watching her health. She was so young to be pregnant and so undeveloped that she had many risks over her condition to be lethal. Plus, she followed Roxas's influence and dropped out of school, in order to claim the consequences of their actions. She agreed over Roxas's proposal, becoming a little disappointment over the fact that he didn't have a ring yet; but she knew he couldn't afford one. He did promise her though, that he would get her one in due time; one that dazzled and shined like her eyes and glowed like her flaxen-colored hair._

_After awhile, Roxas did get Terra's approval; though the older male still wasn't happy about it. _

_Roxas had told Sora and Xion what happened, the both of them actually excited than disappointed like Terra was. They fully supported Roxas and Namine; despite the fact that his parents weren't very pleased._

_Namine remembered the fight Roxas had with his father, the abuse he received from his negligent actions causing her to be distraught. He eased her mind though, joking how it was just her hormones talking. He mentioned to her how much of a bastard his father was being over the situation and that he didn't need him to support her and their baby. They had hoped though that he would lend them a hand; but it would still seem that he still had a grudge against his x-wife for cheating on him each time he looked at Roxas._

_Roxas, Sora and Xion's mother had gone to rehab, leaving Roxas on his own and to fend for himself. Luckily, Terra had agreed to help him pay for an apartment to live with Namine; it wasn't much, but it would have to do. In addition, Namine was the one who had picked out the cheap and vacant spot, hoping the apartment to be their new home. She was perky and happy about it, too overjoyed over her and Roxas getting married to even feel down. Roxas didn't know why though, finding their lives to be too disoriented to actually celebrate._

_But, he was content; finding Namine's smile to be the drug he needed to get over the ordeal._

_Over the course of one month though, Namine and Roxas were finally settled into their new home. They didn't plan their wedding to be anything big or special, just a few friends gathering together to witness the event. But once again, Roxas made another promise to Namine; a promise to give her the best wedding she could ever dream of as soon as he had the money to afford it._

_The apartment was dark and shady, some paint peeling off the stained walls. Namine was dressed in elegant white, a dress that belonged to her deceased mother. She stuck her tongue out as she tried to settle up the Mickey Mouse clock she had bought not too long ago with Olette and Xion. She stood and wobbled on top of a rigid chair, catching her balance in due time before finally mounting the clock on the kitchen wall._

"_There." She complimented herself, finding the clock to be perfect. She turned when she heard Roxas lecturing her from the small dining room, "Namine, you should be more careful!" He dashed towards the girl who seemed to pout and sigh from his vigilant attitude, climbing off the chair and placing it back where it was, "Roxas, I'm fine. I'm only one month pregnant, I'm not disabled you know." She kindly reassured the young male blonde, finding him to be having a panic-attack._

"_I know, but you shouldn't risk doing these things! I care too much about you and the baby to let something bad happen to the both of you." He spoke sternly, scanning her body to make sure she was all right. _

_She nodded meekly with a slight blush, hearing a knock from the door. She reached for it right away, holding her stomach carefully as she rushed towards the door; she had a faint bubble already beginning to swell. _

_She opened the door and smiled when she saw Xion and the others enter inside the apartment. _

"_Namine, you look so beautiful! Too bad there isn't a ring to complete it all up." Xion muttered, causing Roxas to glare at her. Namine only chuckled though, finding her day to be too much of a blessing one for it to get ruined, "I'm sure I'll be fine without it." She reassured humbly, giving Roxas a loving smile, which he returned. He felt lucky to have such a caring person like Namine, considering how damaged the girl's life was._

"_We should be going!" Olette clarified, "We have the appointment set up for two o'clock this afternoon at the town hall!" She helped and hurried Namine and the others out the door, leaving Axel behind with Roxas._

_Both males heard the brunette make some type of lecture at Sora, mentioning about something over fixing his outfit and getting the car. _

_The tall and crimson-haired male slumped his large hands into his deep pockets, making his way over to Roxas while producing a short whistle, "So…marriage and a baby, huh?"_

"_Wasn't exactly the plan; but yeah." The dirty blonde's tone seemed wry. _

_They were silent for a while before Axel decided to speak again, scratching the back of his neck uncomfortably, "Hey…" Roxas took his attention on his best friend, who was surprisingly sober for the event of his wedding day, "You may had loads of shit happen to you and jerked yourself off to Gods no what trouble when in the gang, but…don't fuck this up." He gave Roxas an intense stare, actually making the blonde freeze where he was and become a little apprehensive._

"_Don't worry…I won't…" If only he knew how those words turn out to be false in the future._

_They made it to city hall, all of them gathering in front of the building and heading up the long set of stone steps. Roxas pushed the glass made door open, giving Namine the luxury to enter inside carefully while holding her swollen stomach. Everyone followed inside after her, Roxas being the last one to enter inside the governed building. _

_They made it to the front desk, Sora being the first to speak up, "Hi, we're here over the appointment in arranging the marriage of Roxas Summers and Namine Mikoto." The secretary officer replied somberly, "Do you have the papers regarding their licenses and birth certificates?"_

_Terra slipped inside his coat, pulling out an orange looking folder, "I have it right here." He passed it over to the gentlemen with respect._

_The man opened the folder and peered over the papers under the rim of his glasses, double-checking everything to be there, "Everything seems to be valid." He then looked over a large booklet, "You arrived just in time. The parson that has been set up for you is down the hall." He pointed a finger towards the direction._

_Namine smiled at the man, "Thank you." Everyone made their way down the hall, Roxas helping and walking next to the girl he was to be wedded to._

_The entered inside the domain of the ceremonial room, the total of people to witness the event being the limit of five: Terra, Sora, Xion, Axel (Roxas's best man), and Olette (Namine's maid of honor)._

_Roxas spotted the preacher at the end of the room, walking towards the old man, "May you be Roxas Summers? My name is Ansem, I'll be the one who will be carrying out your wedding." _

_The 'soon to be father' nodded, "Yeah, I'm Roxas Summers. And this is my fiancé, Namine Mikoto." He took Namine's hand and brought her forward, "We don't have rings, but is that okay?" He asked uncertainly, hoping they could still participate in their wedding._

"_That is unfortunate, but; I will let it go." He confirmed to him, making the pair smile with satisfaction. He lifted his hands to signal the others, "So, this is the group who will be witnessing the event?" They all nodded, sitting themselves down on the benches that were provided._

_Ansem smiled, pulling out a bible to prepare his speech, "Well then, shall we begin?" They all proceeded with the ceremony, Roxas and Namine aligning themselves next to each other in front of the man._

_"We are gathered together on this beautiful afternoon to share with Roxas and Namine as they exchange vows of their everlasting love." Ansem began, clearing his throat to begin the passage, "As Roxas and Namine take their vows today, we are privileged to witness the joyous love of a new family, a family that will be nourished and nurtured through the devotion of two separate individuals growing together through the common bonds of love. May their marriage bring them the peace, joy, comfort and contentment that is known in the hearts of all God's children. And may Roxas and Namine both look forward to each new season of their marriage, just as the world looks forward to each new season of the year. For all seasons bring with them their own special moments and memories. An essential requirement of a good marriage is a strong bond of real friendship and trust. Roxas and Namine, your love for each other will grow deeper with every passing day, but it's important to remember that your love stands on a foundation of genuine, mutual affection and respect for each other. To truly LOVE another person is to be willing to accept both their strong points, and their weak points, with equal measures of understanding and respect. The vows you are about to exchange, will serve as a verbal representation of the non-verbal emotions that are as real as any thing that can be seen, heard or touched. For it is not the words that you will speak today that will bond you together as one, but the strength of the love and commitment found deep within your souls." He settled his voice, taking a breather before speaking again, "Let us pray."_

_Deep down, Roxas didn't believe in God; but to over go the ceremony and to Namine's belief, he followed gladly to the tradition. They all gave a silent prayer before the cleric spoke once more, "At this time, I'll ask you, Roxas, and you, Namine, to face each other and take each other's hands." The two blondes faced one another, Namine's eyes glistening from the growing moist of rising tears. _

_Roxas badly wanted to rub them away as they began to fall, "Roxas, will you take Namine to be your wife, your partner in life and your one true love? Will you cherish her friendship and love her today, tomorrow and forever? Will you trust and honor her, laugh with her and cry with her? Will you be faithful through good times and bad, in sickness and in health as long as you both shall live?"_

_Roxas took hold of Namine's petite and slender hands, marveling her soft caress skin; actually feeling unworthy to be in her angelic presence, "I do." He profoundly answered, soothing and hushing Namine's whimpering tears, her face flushed and crinkling as she silently began to cry._

_Ansem turned to the crying girl, producing a genuine smile, "__Namine, will you take Roxas to be your husband, your partner in life and your one true love? Will you cherish his friendship and love him today, tomorrow and forever? Will you trust and honor him, laugh with him and cry with him? Will you be faithful through good times and bad, in sickness and in health as long as you both shall live?"_

_Roxas gave a low chuckle, finding the girl to be too caught up with her emotions to answer right away. She struggled to get her words out, her lungs clutching her heart to speak; this caused Xion and Olette to choke up, tears slowly sliding down their own faces._

_Namine swallowed deeply, squeezing Roxas's hands for support, "Ye…" She sniffled loudly, "Yes…I do…" She choked back a sob, Roxas blowing some air onto her face to cool off her heating tears, causing the girl to giggle and cry some more._

_Ansem nodded with approval from the mutual answer, "At this time, the two lovers shall exchange vows to each other in order to complete the ceremony and collaborate the event of their spiritual journey and their eternal bond. Namine, you shall proceed first in giving your partner your vows." It was at that moment that Axel and Olette got up from their seats, already beginning to slip out pieces of paper that the couple had wrote to each other for the event._

_They both halted their best friends though, finding all they needed to say already written within each other's hearts._

_Namine confidently began to speak, letting Roxas's deep cobalt eyes be her guide to speak, "Roxas…" She was silent for a moment before continuing; "I honestly didn't know what to think when you came into my life during that day when you beat up my brother. I had gone through so much during that time in my youth, that meeting you seemed to be too good to even be a dream; but I did get the chance to meet you. And I am truly, truly, truly grateful that I did. I…" Tears began to descend down her cheeks once more, causing her voice to shake, "I…I…truly do…love you…being with you has honestly made my life… feel more complete… than I could ever feel…" She began to tremble, "It makes me think…that despite everything I've been through…it couldn't be that bad…if I had you with me…" She wheezed, her eyes actually stinging and becoming puffy red; which to Roxas, made her even more beautiful, "I'm so happy to know you exist in my life…and I hope you accept me and our baby in your life as well." She finally let herself go, letting the tears drown out the last bit of her words._

_Roxas didn't care if it wasn't time; he embraced Namine in his arms, placing a soft kiss to her pale forehead._

"_I love you…" He whispered, taking in her loving scent of vanilla, letting it be the drag that he needed for the rest of his life. _

_She muttered back, sniffing up her red nose, "I love you too…" They then separated, their audience becoming touched over their confession and adoration for each other._

_Ansem took this moment to continue, "Now Roxas, at this time, I wish for you to begin exchanging your own vows to your partner." The sandy haired teenager nodded, taking a glance over to Namine._

_He gently placed his large hands upon her growing belly, their baby giving him the strength to speak, "Namine, I can't tell how much you mean to me; how your existence just keeps me sane. As I stand here, I still come to realize how much I don't deserve you. When I met you the first time, I just knew; I wanted to be the one to save you, but instead; you were the one who saved me from destroying my life. And now, you've given me the most perfect gift I can ever ask for…knowing that you are the one carrying a part of us inside you…just makes me realize, how much I need to be with you, for eternity. I know this sounds pretty cliché, and that I'm usually not good with my words, but; when it comes to you; I'm willing to open my heart. I swear to you, I'm going to do the best I can to be __**your**__ husband!" He elaborated, his emotions filling her insides, "I'll get the money to give you that ring; I'll get the money to give you that wedding you always dreamed of! Just please, be patient and accept me for who I am; that is all I ask as your husband." Namine nodded vigorously, her tears spilling out of her as she bit her bottom lip from his words. Roxas chuckled roughly from her reaction, cupping her face with his hands, as his lips were inches away from claiming hers. _

_Seeing as the two newlyweds were getting impatient, Ansem decided to close the knot, "With the power invested in me, I know pronounce you Mr. and Mrs. Summers; you may kiss the bride."_

_Roxas whispered against Namine's lips, "Finally…" He kissed her passionately, motioning their lips to dance together. They could hear their friends and family get up from their seats, applauding the union and matrimony between the two young teenagers. _

_Roxas tried to deepen the kiss, letting his tongue slip out and capture Namine's in a heated frenzy; but the bugle beneath the light haired bride's dress stopped them. _

_Roxas laughed at the inconvenience, gazing down at the forming lump, "I think someone couldn't stand all the mushiness." He replied to Namine who only giggled. When he heard the serene sound he kissed her once more, but this time, he didn't let their lips detach themselves._

_He poured all his feelings into the kiss, letting his tongue graze over hers in a loving contact of desire and longing. Sora and Axel whistled at them, causing Roxas to hold Namine tightly, rubbing her back and hair; he was careful though as to not hurt the baby. _

_He swore he could feel it moving against Namine's lower half, revealing a smile to bloom over his lips as he continued kissing his pregnant wife._

_Everything seemed to fall into place, but the weight of the promises of a better future only proved to be nothing more than a dream waiting to shatter._

End Chapter

Kiome-Yasha: "Yes, I finally made a Namixas wedding scene! I've been waiting for an excuse to make one so badly since we don't have any. Sorry if this update was late everyone, college is just a major let down for me to be focus on my fanfiction life. This chapter was short, but the next one is going to be long. I kept listening to "Love Song Requiem" by Trading Yesterday when typing this chapter; it actually helped a lot. Once again, all I ask from you guys is to give a supportive review; I hope you won't let me down!"

Sora: "Kiome-Yasha will like to give special thanks to _Idiotique _(For being the first reviewer and an awesome one at that!) _Handwritten_ (For giving a huge support and long wonderful reviews!) _KeytoDestiny _(For showing love for the story through long reviews!) _OoColorful MuffinoO_ (For sharing such nice words and comments) _Kingdom~sky_ (For giving a great review!) _Silentmusic16_ (For reviewing a lot lately!) _Damnblackheart_ (Who is the most awesome person in the world!) _AonAllstars _(for being a cool Namixas fan and leaving wonderful reviews!) _Antiyaoifan_ (For leaving a review and supporting a lot!) _Chococrepes_ (For being my first true Namixas pal and reviewing my stories!) We love you guys, and hope you will continue to leave reviews!"


	5. Depression

Declaimer: "I do not own Kingdom Hearts…."

Kiome-Yasha: "Let's get through this, shall we; I have a lot fics on the line to update."

Chapter 5 Depression

I walked out of the jewelry store, holding the little bag close to me like it was my lifeline. I wasn't going to make any more mistakes. I was going to keep the promises that I broke, hoping for some futile reason that it will help Namine wake up from her coma. It was childish, just like my decisions in life but it was all I had left to hope for.

I walked down the street, finding the sun to be bright and burning. The snow sparkled from its rays, beginning to slowly melt from its heating pressure. I was heading back to the hospital, _needing_ to go back. I had people to apologize to after so many years of vent up rage and anguish.

I made it to the gates of the clinic, walking up the pavement road and entering through the lobby with little concentration. I didn't know how I got back. It was almost like Namine was calling back for me, though I didn't know why she would. Or maybe it was my own yearning that brought me back? I couldn't figure it out, my hand gripping the little bag and hearing the item rattle inside.

I stopped though when I found a pair of two familiar feet walk up to me. I looked up, spotting my brother Sora, whose head was bandaged up; I winced inside from the damage I inflicted on him.

"Have time to talk?" Sora asked, sharing a grin at me and passing me one of my favorite snacks; Sea-Salt ice cream.

I shrugged my shoulders lifelessly, finding no voice to reply back. I did find one thing to say though, "I'm sorry, for…"

He shook his head, not accepting my words, "Don't, I could understand how you must've of felt. Come on, lets go talk alone." He pulled me along with him, finding a solitude room for us to have our private conversation.

There was no one around, just the two of us, the echoing sound of people passing by being the only sign of others. Sora unwrapped his Sea-Salt ice cream first, causing me to imitate him slowly afterwards. He began licking the frosty treat, while I just stared at mine with a blank expression. The uncomfortable silence made me realize that he wanted me to speak first.

"How's…. how's…." I couldn't even find my voice to say her name.

"She's still stable, but the doctor told us there wasn't any progress of her waking up anytime soon." Sora simply answered, taking a bite off of his ice cream bar.

My hand that was holding the miniature bag trembled for a second; my nerves making me feel light-headed and astray. Sora seemed to notice the bag, looking down at the label carefully before looking back at me.

He chuckled painfully at me, "Took you long enough to get her one." He must have figured it out; the small little velvet box that gave me hope in resurrecting my promise as a reality, rather than a false dream.

I only nodded from his comment, finding to somewhat agree with his statement. It had taken me a long time to get this, though it was my own fault for taking so long. I wasted so much time, breaking my vows inch by inch over the years I was dismantled.

"You know, Namine's not like mom. She would never be with anyone else besides you; she would never leave you. You should have known better." He was referring to my suspicions of her cheating on me with him; but that wasn't the only thing on his mind that he wanted to lay out, "And it wasn't your fault for what happened on that day."

That's when I gave a hollow laugh, one that mocked his words, "Oh, really?" My ice cream began to melt, but I cared little for the dessert, "You know that's not true, I killed her that day…I killed…."

"No, you didn't!" Sora tried to convince me, his voice becoming stronger, "Roxas, you only did what you had to do! You didn't want to lose Namine! I understand…" I clutched my head, trying to resist the tears that seemed to be coming. I did not want to be reminded of the past, not now; even though it's been nagging at me.

"It's my fault, why did I do that? Tell me Sora!" I shouted at him, tears already beginning to fall carelessly down my cheeks. My question wasn't just about one thing; it was about many things that I screwed up on.

He stared at me with a blank expression, but one that had a resolve, "Because…you love her and you didn't want to lose her…"

I slapped my forehead with the palm of my hand, grinding my teeth together; my tears flooded my face, "Dammit…" My tears blurred my vision, a cough penetrating out of my lungs, "It was either her life or…"

"I know…" Sora responded carefully, embracing my shoulders with his hands, "I know…but Roxas…" I continued to cry mindlessly, Sora struggling to find his words, "You have to know that ever since that day, Namine has been blaming herself…" My eyes opened wide from this, "She felt that losing the baby was her fault…her own child…_your_ child…Namine couldn't forgive herself for being so weak…and that's why…she resorted in trying to kill herself…she couldn't bare the lost…her heart telling her how you must have hated her for killing your baby…"

I right away jolted my body up, "But it wasn't…!"

"And that's why you guys have a talk long overdue…don't mess this up Roxas…you need to go in and see her, reach out to her, share her your feelings that you've been having locked up inside. It should've been the first thing you did before drowning yourself in alcohol and cigarettes again. She's you wife, you need to heal your broken hearts together. Isn't that why you bought that ring?" He pointed over to the bag that was in my hand before looking back at my distraught face, "She'll wake up, if you go to her…for the first time after so many years of suffering alone over your loss…_really_ talk to her…"

I could only stare at Sora, wondering how such a simpleton like him could understand so much of the world. I guess this is why I'm grateful to have him as a brother; he always did have the sappiest things to say.

I nodded solemnly, wiping my nose with my sleeve, "Alright, I'll go see her."

"I'll let the doctor know." He smiled at me, patting my shoulders in order to give me encouragement. He then lifted himself off his seat, leaving the area to tell the doctor.

I turned around to watch him go, becoming surprised in seeing Xion standing by the hall. Sora looked at her for a moment before continuing off; Xion though, kept her eyes on me. Her eyes were glossy, showing evidence that she was about to cry; but she kept it in, her eyes already puffy and red.

She walked over to me, taking slow and steady steps; her boots clapped against the polished floor. When she finally reached over to me, she grabbed me into a tight embrace, clinging onto me for dear life. I was shocked by the affectionate action, not knowing what to really say or do next.

She was the first to speak though, "I'm sorry…I'm so sorry…" My eyes became crestfallen as I realized what she was apologizing for. I closed my eyes softly, snuggling into her embrace as I wrapped my arms around her; memories of my childhood returning to me when my sister hugged me, almost like she wanted to take all the bad things in the world from ever tainting me.

We both cried together, something Namine and I should have done a long time ago; something I should have done to save her life from falling apart, all because of _my_ decisions.

RxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxNxRxN

_Roxas came back through the door of his and his wife's broken down apartment. He sighed irritably under his breath, finding a job to be quite difficult without a degree; he guessed he would have to settle for working at good old "Cid's Record Store" for a little while longer. He was hoping to find a better job though in order to get more money when it came time in supporting his and Namine's baby. So far though, they were able to have enough money to make the baby's room, the gifts they received in the baby shower filling the room to be bright and heavenly. He also needed to start saving on that ring and wedding he promised to Namine on their wedding day.  
_

_Talking about Namine and the baby…_

_The young fifteen-year-old blonde was now nine months in, already baked and ready to be popped any day now. Everyone was excited over the event, all of them becoming anxious in seeing Namine give birth already. They never confirmed the gender of the child, wanting to leave it as a surprise._

_Roxas shut the door behind him carefully, spotting Namine to be nowhere in sight in the living room; it's where she usually was when she was waiting for him to get back home, that or in the kitchen cooking. He became wry of this, placing his bag down and calling out for her, "Namine? Where are you, honey?" He got no answer, but he did hear something shatter in the baby's room._

_He quickly dashed towards the hall for the room, beginning to panic when he heard Namine begin to scream. He bashed the door open, the forced velocity causing the door to smash a large hole into the wall. He saw Namine crouched down to the ground, gripping her pelvic area with both hands…covered in blood. _

_Roxas gasped in fright, finding the blood not to be a good sign, "Namine!" He ran over to her, the girl whining and screaming from the excruciating pain. Her water had broken, as there was a wet puddle underneath her, along with the mess of blood. _

_He discovered that the thing that shattered was their picture frame of their wedding day, but he ignored it as he took his full attention on his wailing wife, "Namine, what happened!?"_

"_Roxas, the baby…the baby…AAAHHHHHHH!!!" She scrunched up, her tears spilling everywhere across her face. She couldn't find anything else to say while feeling the pressure that was pressing up against her lower half; she also felt faint and dizzy from the blood lost._

_Roxas couldn't think straight, the sight of the blood making him turn pale and woozy, "O-oo-ookay! Ho—hol—hold---on!" He quickly pulled out his cell-phone that was in his pants' pocket, dialing Terra's number with lighting speed. The phone began to ring, Roxas trying to sooth Namine's pain while she continued to cry out and scream. _

_Terra soon picked up the other end after six rings, "Hello?" _

"_Terra!" Roxas replied right away, "Namine's in labor, but she's bleeding like hell!" _

"_WHAT!?"_

"_Call everyone and meet us at the hospital! We'll meet you guys there!" He hanged up without hearing any other protests from Terra, only having faith that he would do as he said. _

_He looked over at Namine, who began rocking her body back and forth, hoping for it to ease the pain away. He clutched his hand over his forehead, trying to get his mind cleared before commencing any actions. He realized though that he didn't have time to think, so he quickly bent down by Namine's side, looping her arm around his shoulder. He placed a hand behind her back to keep her in place next to him, overlapping her hand that was on their baby with his own, blood beginning to spread over his hand._

"_Come on, Namine. We have to get you to the hospital, you can do it baby." He carefully picked her up, wincing when she gasped loudly in pain, whimpering softly from the movement._

_He paced himself next to her, looking behind him to see the trail of red liquid that was dripping down her nether region between her legs. He tried to ignore the reality and calamity of the situation, reaching the door of the apartment and opening it. He briskly, but skillfully helped Namine into the hall, closing the door behind them, dismissing to lock it. _

_He hurried them down the hall to the stairs, the apartment being too cheap to have an elevator; which is something they really should have thought about. He looked down the stairs then back at Namine's wheezing form, the young girl panting heavily. _

_He noticed her eyes beginning to close from the blood loss, "Namine, stay with me!" He barked at her, his nerves shaking._

_He had no other choice; he quickly picked Namine's pregnant weight body in his arms in a bridal like fashion. He spoke, trying to lighten the mood, "This isn't how I pictured carrying you out." He tried to humor, hoping it would calm them both; but it didn't help much when Namine didn't respond._

_He dashed down the stairs, ignoring those who stared passed them. He finally reached the parking lot, placing Namine in the backseat and making sure she was secured, "Are you alright there, baby?" She shook her head, whimpering softly, "Roxas, it hurts so much…" She looked down at herself, discovering the blood for the first time, "What…? Why am I bleeding…?" _

"_I don't know…" Roxas answered honestly. He closed the door abruptly, hurrying over to the driver seat of his car._

_He unlatched the door, slamming it behind him as he got into his seat. He forced his keys into the ignition, twisting them to start the engine. He looked back at Namine as he veered the car out; rapidly turning the wheel, "Stay with me, Namine…stay with me…stay with me…" He repeated the same thing over and over again until they reached the hospital, hoping that it was the key in making everything okay._

_He parked at the front of the hospital, receiving complaints from the employees as he helped Namine out of the car. They became silent though when they saw how serious the condition was of the pregnant girl, noticing the blood that was plastered all over the married couple._

_Roxas carried Namine inside, shouting for help admittedly, "Someone help me! My wife's in labor and she's bleeding!" A nurse hurried over to them right away, "What's her name? How long ago did her water break?"_

"_Her name is Namine Summers! Now please, just help her!" He shouted urgently, refusing to answer any other questions until he knew that his wife and child were going to be all right. _

_The nurse nodded in agreement, calling another nurse over to bring a wheelchair for the girl, but that plan changed when Namine began to scream bloody murder, "AAAAHHHHHHH! ROXAS MAKE IT STOP!!!" _

"_We're going to need to bring her in NOW!" The nurse shouted to the others, bringing over a bed for the girl in order to wheel her to the emergency room. _

_Roxas carefully placed Namine on the bed, the nurses giving her a quick and hasty check-up. Roxas went off after them, following the group as they dragged Namine off down the hall. The doctor popped out of nowhere, already taking protocol of the situation, "What's the status?" _

_Instead of any of the nurses answering, Roxas was the first to respond, "She's my wife. She just started bleeding when her water broke." He was shocked to see how calm he was being, though his nerves felt like they were about to burst out of his skin._

"_You were there to witness this?" The doctor asked, "No, I came home and found her like this." He answered remorsefully._

"_I presume you're the father?" The professional asked, checking Namine's pulse._

_Roxas nodded, giving the doctor an accusing look, but he replied, "Yeah, I'm the father! Can you please tell what's going on!?" _

_The doctor looked up to see the emergency room up ahead, "No time!" He confirmed, already rushing in with the others and taking out the necessary tools and equipment to deliver the baby. They all jumped into the suitable garments for the procedure, one of the nurses handing Roxas a spare one; he was allowed to stay since he was the father. _

"_Here take this! Hurry up and put it on!" She urgently demanded at him, causing Roxas to become flustered. He hurried and put on the outfit though, placing a cap on his head as well, for it was required for him to wear it._

"_Roxas…. Roxas…where are you…?" Namine asked weakly, sweat dripping down her face, her eyes dilating. The boy rushed to her side, gripping her hand and pushing back her drenched hair from her face._

_The doctor commanded Namine, finding her expression to be of concern, "Stay with us, Namine. We'll get through this!" He helped bring over the tools, the nurses attaching Namine with all the needed appliances for them to see the condition of her and the baby. _

_They had placed her on the birthing bed; covering the girl up with blue blankets, blood seeping through the thin sheets. They spread her legs open, placing them up on the holders that were necessary to keep them up and separated. Namine was getting dizzy, the beaming light from overhead blinding her vision. _

_She winced painfully, "The light…" She moaned out in pain, Roxas directing himself to one of the nurses._

"_Isn't there a way to dim those down?" He asked hopefully, but she shook her head, "We can't do that." She spoke over her mask, the doctor already diving in between Namine's legs to check over the damage, "This doesn't look good, the baby is cramming in; it looks like the fallopian tub is wrapped around it." _

_Roxas gasped in fright from this information, the doctor ordering the nurses for the next step, "We might need to perform an emergency C section, STAT!" The nurses flipped the blanket over Namine's stomach, the doctor taking the needed tools to perform the procedure; but he was halted by Roxas's hand, "WAIT! What's going on!!! I can't let you cut her up!!!" _

"_Get him out of here!!!" The doctor demanded dramatically, a loud static like sound going off on the monitors soon afterwards. They all took their attention on the machines, finding both Namine and the baby's heartbeats to have stopped, a long flat line coming from both their ends._

_Roxas's eyes widened from the sight, his lips trembling in horror. _

"_GET HIM THE HELL OUT OF HERE!!!" The doctor ordered once more, taking out the defibrillator from the side. He turned the machine on, unhooking the two handles and rubbing them against each other to create friction. A nurse that was nearby stripped Namine's shirt open, exposing her chest, "Clear!" The doctor announced, pressing the chargers to her chest and giving her a full electric shock, pulsing her body to jump forward. _

"_Namine!" Roxas called out, but the nurses pushed him back, struggling to push him out of the room. When Roxas saw this, he tried to push them away from him, "Namine!!! Let got of me!!! That's my WIFE!!!" He exclaimed critically, bearing his face to turn red in anger, his arms wailing to get through them, "NAMINE!!!!"_

_They finally got him out of the room, the nurses hurrying back inside while one stayed outside, "I'm sorry, but you must stay out here!" She clarified, already rushing back in the room to aid the others._

_Roxas attempted to get back inside though, soon discovering other staff members to be pulling him back, "Let me go!!! NAMINE!!!" He called out once more, still feeling the warm soak of blood underneath his clothing from his wife and child._

_Even though only ten minutes passed, it felt like ten hours to Roxas. He was still jumpy, watching people rush back and forth in and out of the emergency birthing room. He gulped, spotting some nurses and guards to be watching him; making sure he didn't go back inside the room again. _

_Ten more minutes passed by, and there was still no news.... What was taking them so damn long!!?_

_Roxas soon heard footsteps coming towards him; he looked up and spotted Terra and the others. _

"_What happened!? Where's Namine and the baby!?" The older teen asked drastically, his girlfriend Aqua holding him back, she couldn't stop his rampage though, "Where's my cousin, Roxas!?" He picked the boy up from his collar, soon noticing the blood that was underneath his surgery gown, "What the hell is this!?"_

"_It's Namine's…." Roxas stated lifelessly, finding nothing else to say, not with his family's life on the line. For all he knew, they could be both dead and they were just hiding the truth from him._

_Xion and Sora just looked at Roxas sympathetically, fear soon gripping their own hearts over the worse possible outcome. They soon heard the door swish open from the room where Namine was, the doctor rushing out in a hurry._

_He went over to Roxas right away, finding him to be the most appropriate person to answer his unwanted question, "Roxas, as husband and father, we need to ask for your permission in making a decision over your wife's life, or your child's."_

_Everyone gasped from this, Roxas's legs beginning to shake, traveling up his body with full control of breaking him down into pieces. He couldn't believe this question that was being brought out to him, his eyes trembling and pulsing in an unusual behavior._

"_No…no…no…no…no…__**no**__….__** no**__…__**no**__…__**no**__…" His mind began to cave-in on him, causing him to grip his head tightly in defense. He fell to the floor, his body shaking uncontrollably, "__**No…no…no…no…**__" Xion and Sora came to his side, along with Axel; they both tried to pull him up, hoping to snap him out of it before he lost it._

"_We need a __**decision**__." The doctor claimed strongly, gripping his hands together apologetically, "We need to know which one to save and which one to let go…"_

"_SAVE THEM BOTH, DAMMIT!" Roxas demanded, launching himself back on his feet, taking hold of the doctor's collar, "YOU SAVE THEM BOTH YOU BASTARD!!" He shocked everyone from the aggressive assault, pushing his siblings and best friend back._

"_I'm afraid we can't do that. We only have the necessities to save __**one**__." The Doctor explained calmly, some sweat pouring down his face from Roxas's outburst of rage._

"_Bullshit!" The young boy retorted._

"_It's true…I'm sorry…" The doctor replied softly, placing his hands over Roxas's, "You must make a decision, or else you'll lose both."_

_The blonde teenager released the doctor's shirt, collapsing himself back on the floor, "You really…expect me…to choose?" He asked inertly, his whole body still and frozen. _

_Everyone remained silent, though Terra did not, "She's my family! I should make this decision!" He had to if Roxas was just going to sit there and let them both die. _

"_I feel it's responsible for him to choose." The doctor reprimanded softly, gazing down at Roxas, awaiting his answer._

_A nurse in the room though banged the door open from the surgery room, "Doctor, we're going to lose them both!" The man turned around, already taking off to prolong the patients' death, but he was stopped when he felt something grab him from below his ankle. _

_He looked down, spotting a nest of blonde spiky hair, finding the person to be Roxas. The boy's hand shook, his grip on the fabric tightening, everyone waiting for him to say something._

_When he did, his voice was strained and desperate, "Please…please, save Namine…. please, save her…save her…." He brought his face up harshly, warm tears streaming down his face, "Please, save her!!! I want you to save my wife! Don't let her die! I beg of you! Please, just don't let her die!!!" _

_There, he made his decision; sacrificing his baby…his innocent child …for the girl he loved…_

_The doctor stared at him like the broken person he was, but, he kept his word, "Don't worry, I will…" And he took off to commence the duties that were requested by him._

_Roxas soon broke down, repeating the same words over and over again, "Make her stay…"_

_They had just cleaned and stabilized Namine to her own private room, the girl asking for her child constantly to the nurses and doctors who came in to check-up on her. They refused to tell her any news though, Namine requesting to see Roxas right away; she had something pulling at her heartstrings, and it wasn't a pleasant feeling._

_When the doctor's told Roxas that she wanted to see him, the boy froze in terror; he didn't know what to say to her or how to see her when he himself was trying to deal with the lost of their child. _

_Terra jumped out of his seat, "What are you going to say to her?" He demanded intensely, not wanting the news to break his cousin's heart, though it was unavoidable._

"_I honestly don' know." Roxas answered candidly, his face downcast and already heading for the room she was in, "I'm just going to tell her the truth…I have to…" He opened the door, spotting Namine who was looking out the window, spotting the rain amongst the gloomy scenery._

_When he closed the door behind him, everyone took their custom to grieve, Axel cussing under his breath as he grunted, "Dammit all to hell…" He scrunched his shoulders up, wincing and preparing for the blow that Namine was about to receive; not knowing the damage Roxas was about to cause._

_When the door clicked shut, Namine turned towards the door to see Roxas. She smiled slightly at him, but it didn't last long when she saw his miserable expression, "Roxas, what's wrong?" She asked innocently, hoping for everything to be all right._

_Roxas cursed the sweetness to her voice, gripping his hold on the door handle. He felt like a murder, awaiting his execution by the one he cherished the most._

"_Roxas?" She called out to him with concern, finding his posture to be unnerving. _

_He finally looked up at her, bringing his head up slowly, his eyes wet and darker than before; like a storm waiting to swoop him up from the inside, "I…I…. I'm sorry…" _

"_Roxas…where's my baby?" She asked once more, beginning to shake her head when everything was slowly starting to click, "No…no…"_

_He rushed to her side, gripping her hand which she fiercely neglected the touch, wincing in pain as if he had just burned her. Roxas was left aghast from the treatment, turning away from her and refusing to look at her; he didn't notice the hurt in Namine's eyes when he did this._

_She called out to him once more, "Roxas, please…" She begged, her words clogging her throat as she begged him not to hate her, despise her. She knew she was powerless, but to lose his child was unforgivable, especially if he hated her for it; she wouldn't live with herself. She let herself succumb to her weakness, failing to give birth to his baby, their baby. She would be disposable, nothing but trash to him now for not trying hard enough. How can he want her or touch her now after what she had done?_

"_I can't…" He spoke lowly, "Our baby is gone, Namine…so…I just can't…I'm so sorry…" He wanted to explain to her how weak he must have been for them to lose their child. How she must have blamed him for letting all this happen; to have so much faith only to let it slip away. It had to be his fault, considering his overdose of alcohol and drugs; it just had to be, and now she couldn't bare being in his presence. He let their baby die; he chose her over their child; if she knew, she would probably want nothing more to do with him. He was afraid, afraid how she would react if he told her the truth, afraid to lose her._

_Namine tried to reach out for his hand, her mind tearing her apart, causing her soul to be materializing through her tears, "Roxas…" After so many years of trying to keep her life together, despite all the tragedies, nothing could compare to that moment. How, how can she live with herself now? When everything she had to live for was breaking down in front of her. _

_When he felt her fingertips brush against his, Roxas snapped back in horror. He clenched his eyes shut, "I'm sorry!" He dashed out of the room, banging the door open and ran down the hall. She heard the others call out for him, but her mind totally had shut them out. She couldn't think straight, her hand still stretched out to where Roxas was just standing a few moments ago. _

_When the door finally reeled back to close itself, Namine mindlessly slammed back into her comforter. She lost the main things that were important to her in a blink of a day, tears slowly cascading down her cheeks, leaving her to be motionless and lifeless. Her eyes looked to be dead, becoming darker than the abyss, leaving her body to become dry and hollow like a corpse._

_She slowly brought her hands up to her lap, grasping the white sheets tightly in her fists, tears soundlessly falling down her flushed face. The water drops fell hastily upon the white sheets, causing slight and small grey areas to appear. She had just lost her baby, and now her husband despised her for letting it happen. She never wanted to die so badly in her life until that moment; the darkness being her only companion to rely on, for the light was a fleeting moment for her shadow._

_The light of a better future was snuffed out, causing the couple to drift apart, one holding the lighter, while the other the candle._

End Chapter

Kiome-Yasha: "This was a little longer than the previous chapters before. You now all know the truth of what happened between Roxas and Namine, showing the truth and reason towards the present. I hope you all got the message and connection to all this, if not, then I'm a bad writer. You guys know what to do to make Kiome-Yasha happy! Leave a review, for it brings the sun out for my rainy day; also, do it for Namine and Roxas!"

Sora: "Kiome-Yasha would like to give special thanks to: _AonAllstars _(For being an amazing person!)_, Idiotique _(For the great review and wonderful support; including being a great writer)_, Handwritten _(For leaving long reviews and awesome ones that made me smile), _Silentmucic16_ (For always reviewing and being a cool dude!), _Damnblackheart _(For being the best friend ever who likes my fics!), _Kingdom~Sky_ (For being a great reviewer.) Wow, we're short from last chapter, but oh well, thanks you guys! We love you!"


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